From deep, deep in the cotton-pickin' red clay'd piney woods o' east Texas, I bring you the tales of my sister Bethzilla, hideous freakin' white trash welfare-cheatin' pill-popping, bowl-smoking, vodka-swilling redneck swamp thing what done crawled up out of the danged boggy bottoms of Uncertain, Texas and also of Momma, a transplanted, dirt-floored, rice paddy, hand-raised Cajun girl from the south Texas depression era. Take a look see. Go ahead, lookee.
Got up at 6 a.m. to hunt down some exotic auto parts which I installed in my truck by 10 a.m., then I took some guys from our Home For Wayward Veterans to Wallyworld, did laundry, worked out at the downtown Y, took a lovely steam bath and swim, bicycled a few hours, then ate a great venison meal and hit the rack at 5 p.m. Day done. The last day of the year 2011. The last day of 2011 well done.