Friday, April 29, 2011

Living La Dolche Vita Large At Taxpayer Expense

                                   Kevin (the one with the green pole sticking out of his head
                                   and the pot pipe hidden in his jacket) pictured here with one
                                   of the homeless bums who sleeps in front of the Motel Marquis.

    Kevin The Wife Swapper is back in the neighborhood. He, his wife and their 7 year-old daughter are living in a Dodge recreation vehicle, a 23 footer, parked tonight in front of the Vietnamese Voodoo Lot. Maybe you remember them from when they lived directly across from me in the Motel Marquis, room 102. I called them The Ricky Retardo Family. I'm not being mean. The Social Security people have certified all three as retarded and give them all big monthly SSDI checks.

    The Retardo Family moved out of my crack motel last year to go live with The Angry Haitian (see previous email) in a Section 8 Housing duplex. It didn't last very long as The Angry Haitian was practicing voodoo and child molestation in the duplex's garage. The police had to release The Angry Haitian as he used to be the Haitian ex-president's bodyguard and still had some sort of diplomatic immunity.

    Kevin bought the 1974 RV ten months ago and the family has been living in it ever since, parking in various meglomart parking lots. Kevin's daughter's school board came down and took pictures of their mobile home. They wanted to remove the little girl from Kevin's care and put her in a real house, but the Social Security Office said that would complicate their check payouts paperwork and overrode the school board.

    Kevin is pretty happy with RV living. He parks the 23 footer mostly in Alondra Park (behind El Camino College just up the street), empties his waste behind the Chevron station on Artesia, and sits around his RV living la dolche vita every day while waiting for his monthly checks.
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