Saturday, March 05, 2011

Movie Extra


by James Jarvis
02/11/02

My 52 year-old roommate,
waiting to be discovered by Hollywood
or abducted by talent-spotting aliens,
thinks that Hollywood will probably not pick him
to be the next James Bond
because,
my roommate informs me,
he may not be tall enough for the role,
but he talks to Marilyn Monroe
at the St. John's Church in North Hollywood,
where he goes to meet her,
and she says
he may yet get the role.

He is an industry trooper,
my roommate,
this movie extra,
who was ashed in "Volcano",
blown off his feet
in an explosion in "Collateral Damage",
asphyxiated at Universal Studios,
fed bad tuna on a dozen other sets
and attacked by other movie extras
who just wanted him to shut up on the set
about his blossoming movie career.

When he's not working as a background extra
in a TV sitcom
commercial or feature film,
my roommate
is often yakking in my ear
about whether or not
he's going to be the next James Bond.

Alien abductors,
wherefor art thou?
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