Monday, February 28, 2011

Uncle Sam Wants Civil Service Fence Post Inspector Supervisors

Life belongs to the living, and he who lives must be prepared for changes.----Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

I am tentatively signed up to become a fence post in- spection supervisor trainee. Yes, you read right: a fence post inspection supervisor trainee.

I got a flyer in my mail box a few weeks ago informing me that a wonderful new job opportunity was being developed for disabled veterans such as myself and that if I was interested to bring a copy of my DD214 (record of military service) and proof of federal disability rating of 10 percent or more to the U.S. Vets job developer. A new fence post inspection company is starting up and they need service-connected disabled veterans on the team to qualify for certain federal government contracts.

Fence post inspection supervisor: who'd a thunk it? I'll be jiggered. I've been a Vulcan Fire detector salesman, a milk jugger, a house painter, a construction worker, a loan shark enforcer, a short order cook, a soldier, a graphic artist, a landlord, a hay hauler, a prepress color separator, a convenience store clerk, a concierge, an output operator, a gypsy cabbie, a regular taxi driver, a pimp, an escort agency owner, a CFO, a civil service aircraft mechanic, a U.S. Post Office mailhandler, a gas station graveyard cashier, a Star Bucks syrup squeezer, a day laborer, a security guard, a reporter, an art director, a beer and soda stockboy, a magazine editor, an ice house manager, a Dairy Queen cook, a brick jiggerer, a bus pollster, a frogleg fryer, a speechwriter, a bum and a paperboy, but I never ever ever guessed that all this experience was preparing me to become a fence post inspection supervisor.

I'm signed up. There is paperwork to be done. Forms to fill out. Screenings to pass. Hurdles to hurd. Probably ass to kiss, too. This is quasi-government semi-civil service work, you know. Not just any Tom, Dick or hairy can qualify for fence post inspection supervision.

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