Tuesday, March 06, 2012

My Homeless Attorney

Homelessness wasn't thrust upon me. I chose it as an adventure. I made 6 months of preparations to move into the street. I was bored with my life and wanted a one year adventure. Turned out to be 5 years. It's a whole lot easier to move in to the street than to get back off it.

One of my goals was to spend a night in every rattrap crack motel in Los Angeles County until I could declare a winner of the worst crack motel in L.A. I finally found it on Sunset Boulevard: The Sunset Pacific. A little 11-unit motel that tried to burn down while I was sleeping it came in a very close second place.

I was working most of the time I was homeless; in gas stations, driving call girls or as a movie extra. That helped, but I think the thing that helped me endure most was when I adopted a senile dementia-inflicted 72 year-old homeless Jewish attorney who kept me very busy with his daily dramas, too busy to think about teenagers shooting at me for sport, cops rousting me, vigilante homeowners kicking my ass or the muggers (I was mugged 7 times in two years but I'm proud of my 7-0 record there).

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