Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Ghosts, Bugs And Brand X Women

LETTERS FROM LALALAND


Went up to Hollywood to see “Congo” last night at the Chinese Mann Theater. Across the street Native Americans were picketing Disney’s El Capitan Theater, ghost dancing and beating their chests and drums over the racism they perceive in Disney’s “Pocohontas.”

They handed me one of their tracts depicting a seedy looking Mickey Rat character but I didn’t hang around as the Disney Goons (muscle men in tuxedos) were closing in.


My old army buddy Dave in El Paso has his own movie trivia of the week. Seems his curiousity was piqued by a Parental Guidance rating of “Casper The Friendly Ghost”, so he shelled out four bucks and took a look see. Dave says Casper has a full frontal nude scene in the movie. Anything to get better box office, I guess.


Dave tells me that Saturday morning cartoons have gone Hollywwod, too. He says that suddenly there are a lot of buxom female superheroines filling up the Saturday morning cartoon lineup.

I stopped watching Saturday morning shows when they stopped showing Bugs and Pee Wee Herman was cancelled, but Dave's description of the mammory-endowed feminine presence on Saturday morning cartoons may persuade me to take another look.


THE L.A. QUESTION:
IF A BUS PIRATE PUNCHES YOU IN THE NOSE AND TAKES YOUR WALLET, DOES A HINDU TOURIST IN ARKANSAS LOOSE HIS HOTEL RESERVATIONS?

Besides watching Saturday morning cartoons with prurient interest, Dave reads, too. Apparently some “Nothing Is Truly Knowable” philosopher/writer goof has got Dave’s pragmatical empiricist goat. He read about L.A.'s bus pirate problem and asked me why Angelinos put up with such madness.

Because Angelinos are concerned that if they try to alter the course of their fate during a mugging, gangbanger attack or bus pirate takeover, it'll "mess with the fabric of the cosmological universe, dude!"

I agree wholeheartedly with him about The L.A. Question. When I was taking philosophy at St. Mary’s UNdiversity, the brothers there were always framing philosophical questions to us unwashed masses so that only one answer, their answer, was possible.


I have always thought, dear confused blog reader, that my answers to them, those dialectical head-boinking brothers, framed so that no possible correlation to the question asked could be found, was one of my major contributions to campus life there.

Damn, dog, what did you just say?
 
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