Evil Pines

When the fight begins within himself, a man's worth something. ---Robert Browning

A pine tree fell on my mother's east Texas house here in Marshall a few years back. The damage was extensive. My mother's house is surrounded by 100-foot-tall pine trees. Some of them lean towards the house ominously.

My mother eyes these pines with much suspicion. If they'll do it once, they'll do it again. That's just what kind of mean-spirited plants these big old pine trees are. You can't trust them. Everybody knows that. Ask any of the old ladies down at the bingo hall. They'll tell you. A pine tree is good for nothing except getting hit by lightning and falling on your house.

Every time my mother leaves the house, she scurries as quickly as a 78 year-old can go, from the front door to the car, hoping they won't be paying attention and miss their chance to squash her.

And now she's got me doing it. Evil pines. I've got my eye on you.

Tags: evil pines, Pine trees, east Texas, Marshall, tall pines, bingo hall, vlogging, funny video, viral video, lobcock, opisthotonicke, Robert Browning, jarvis