My friend Right Angle Al is a freelance production assistant for the movie industry in L.A. It's seasonal, sporadic work; a week here, three or four weeks off, then a few weeks there, but it pays pretty good.
In between movie gigs, he works in a Fairfax district pizza joint for a friend and he's got a money making sideline selling questionable massage parlors ad space in the local tabloids. He plays soccer every Sunday morning that he can and enjoys few things more than kicking those Armenian soccer players asses.
Right Angle Al was a Navy brat raised in Argentina. I think his childhood in South America sharpened his Italian sensibilities. I met him when we were both driving call girls for Pacific Coast Entertainment. He is a Bukowski fan and artifact collector.
The activity that defines Right Angle Al most though, I think, is his gambling. Right Angle Al loves the juice of gambling. Half the time I talk to him on the phone, he's got his bookie on the other line.
Here's a sample of classic Right Angle Al from an email he sent me:
The activity that defines Right Angle Al most though, I think, is his gambling. Right Angle Al loves the juice of gambling. Half the time I talk to him on the phone, he's got his bookie on the other line.
Here's a sample of classic Right Angle Al from an email he sent me:
"I took a one-day road trip to Vegas again. MGM to see George
Carlin Wed. night. Again free room. Advantages of having a players
card. Paid $60 bucks to see the old man curse and insult the crowd.
Very few people can make my side ache laughing and Carlin is one of
those people.
To dress for the event, I put on a black T-shirt with white
letters. T-shirt had a line made famous by Joe Pesci in Raging Bull:
"Fuck You, You Fucking Fuck". American sentence with noun, verb and
adjective.
After the show (commenced at nine and ended at eleven pm), I
perched my ass on seat #1 table 55 to try my chances at blackjack. My
game since I can count cards. Single deck. $25 minimum. Blackjack,
however, paying only 6-5. Off to a slow start, I quickly dropped $200.
Staving off elimination, I stemmed the tide and patiently waited
for the dealer to go on a bust streak. After two hours, the dealer was
losing her luck. The dealer was a cutie, named Chris, young 24-year old
who lived her whole life in Las Vegas. I quickly turned the tide and I
was up $200 when the swing shift came at one a.m. to replace the floor
supervisor (rep who monitors my playing minutes) and pit boss.
For the first six hours, nobody at MGM said a word regarding my
shirt. In fact, three employees laughed as well as many patrons, and
I'd have given out the www.9deep.com website address for ordering such
said shirt. With an agenda to pursue, this angry Brit (or Aussie) pit
boss named Paul Taylor scurries over to my right ear and blasts my
eardrum for all to hear "Your shirt is offensive. Either turn the
shirt inside out, or you'll hav to leave the premises".
Are you kidding me? I'm in Sin City. Las Vegas. After midnight.
I tried to explain I wore it to celebrate my second row seat watching
the master of vulagar comedy, Mr. George Carlin. Whole table blanched
at the pit boss' rudeness.
Being up, I gathered my chips and walked slowly to the cashier
window. After cashing out, I talked to the supervisor and asked for a
complaint form. I filled out two pages detailing how I've been a
patron twice in May and how surprised I was tossed out onto the
streets. I mean, for a T-shirt. The dude could've been more tactful.
He could ask me to change the shirt. If he was smart, he would've
given me a generic MGM Grand T-shirt from the gift shop yards away and
tell me to change in the men's room. Nope. He had to give me the
boot.
Even while filling out the two-page form, the couple next to me
cashed out, and the dealer on her break apologized for treatment I got.
Well, I better hear from those bastards by next week. If not, then
either you or Gordon, will place a phone call impersonating the
law firm of Gordon & Jolie. We'll sue unless I get comp rooms and
a show and a written apology from MGM.
signed,
Right Angle Al"
Tags: Revver, bossy bottom, dressing rude, viral video, video blog, funny videos, Right Angle Al, MGM casino, production assistant, Navy brat, Argentina, Bukowski, factotum, George Carlin, Joe Pesci, Raging Bull, blackjack, floor supervisor, pit boss, shirt is offensive, Sin City, Las Vegas, comps, jarvis, marquisdejolie
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