On A California Roll

(click pic)

I’m on a roll here; a California roll. My homeless attorney Don visits the sushi distribution plant dumpsters next door to my homeless veterans shelter and loads up on trays of sushi, tuna rolls and my favorite product: the California Roll.

The California roll is a sesame seed-covered rice cake stuffed with imitation crab meat, cucumber, seaweed and avocado with deli-thin slices of ginger and a cup of Wasabe (green mustard) on the side. I have one or three trays of the stuff almost every night at work for lunch on my graveyard shift.

The California Roll is a symbol to me, a symbol of all the free food one can get in this California city. Tommorow morning, me and my homeless attorney will eat our first breakfast down in the vets’ shelter mess hall. Sunday mornings are not very good at the vets’ shelter mess hall: two hard boiled eggs and a piece of toast. No juice. This morning it was a plastic bowl of oat meal and a cupcake. No juice.

After the mess hall mess, my attorney and I will drive down to a Torrance church where the church people will cook us pancakes and scrambled eggs out on the patio while us homeless bums enjoy the sunrise and drink all the orange juice we can handle. Then I’ll take a nap and at noon we drive over to St. John’s in Gardena for their sack lunch picnic for bums.

Then I’ll take another nap and run over to El Camino at 4 p.m. for a free, church sponsored dinner in Alondro Park. Again, an outdoor picnic for aromatic bums.

Then, if we’re still hungry, my attorney and I will head back to the vets’ shelter for Sunday dinner.

Three blocks from my vets shelter is a food bank where they give you a sack or two of groceries every two weeks. It’s mostly canned goods, pies and breads, but I can trade back at the dorm for the snacks I like.

Also, there is a booming business in discount food stamps at the dorm. I can buy them from the V.I.P.s who haven’t gotten a job yet and need the cash for as little as 25 cents on the dollar, so if I actually wanted to BUY food, maybe something the churches won’t cook for me or that the food banks don’t have, I can go get that food damned near free.

I’m on a roll here; a California roll

Tags: Department of Veteran Affairs, Revver, viral video, funny videos, homeless veterans, veterans shelter, shelter, sober living facility, California roll, my homeless attorney, dumpsters, dumpsterdiving, dumpster sushi, sushi, rice cake, wasabe, free food, shelter mess hall, U.S. Vets, U.S. military, chow hall, food missions, church food, pancakes for bums, soup kitchen, Alondro Park, El Camino, Gardena, St. John, food bank, free groceries, food stamps, Veterans In Progress, jarvis, marquisdejolie