A Zippy Ending For My Turgid Little Tale of Toiletry Gone Awry

Tags: urgent crap, silent fart, Turdman, stockboy, Arco, Arcology, Arconians, gas station, propane, Texas, Factotum, jarvis, viral video, marquisdejolie, marquis, happy ending, crapper alert

He who does not get fun and enjoyment out of every day . . . needs to reorganize his life. ---George Mathew Adams

One of my friends wrote me a zippy ending for "Day of the Cabbage Patch Turd" (see post below):

“Faster then an urgent crap, more powerful then a silent fart, able to flush what no man has flushed before (this last line brought the concept up to date). Look behind the counter, it's a clerk, it's a stock boy, it's Turdman. Disguised as James Jarvis, ruckus transient/author turned stock boy, Turdman fights a never-ending battle for...??? well the toilet works.”